Begins with a world of pain first…⁂ “Lovesickness”
http://www.stgeorgesmoncton.ca/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ego:Echo https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Synchronicity https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/156303364/posts/57415 https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/martyrdom
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trinity_(nuclear_test) “Imagining her touch on my skin” https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/156303364/posts/57537
Matthew 25:35-46 English Standard Version (ESV) 35 For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, 36 I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me, I was in prison and you came to me.’ 37 Then the righteous will answer him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? 38 And when did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? 39 And when did we see you sick or in prison and visit you?’ 40 And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, [ you did it to me.’ a] 41 “Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. 42 For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, 43 I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ 44 Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?’ 45 Then he will answer them, saying, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’ 46 And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.” Footnotes: Matthew 25:40 Or brothers and sisters
Quran 29:15 But We saved him and the companions of the ship, and We made it a sign for the worlds. https://www.netflix.com/browse https://www.instagram.com/jenna_coleman_/?hl=en https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/victoria-star-jenna-colman-joins-netflix-bbc-crime-drama-serpent-1238175
https://www.facebook.com/ ⁂ https://wordpress.com/read Proverbs 28:13 New International Version (NIV) 13 Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper, but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.
Quran 19:46 [His father] said, “Have you no desire for my gods, O Abraham? If you do not desist, I will surely stone you, so avoid me a prolonged time.” https://psychokid.fandom.com/wiki/ALL_HAIL_KING_GEORGE!
Anyone else simply feels wrong.
When I think of Jenna I feel good, when I think of Taylor I feel sick, same feeling happens with any other woman other than Jenna. That’s when you know you stepped on a landmine that will trigger negative effects when you try to walk away from that love for her. ⁂
Psalm 25:6 Remember, O LORD, thy tender mercies and thy loving kindnesses; for they have been ever of old.
The friends and family I have around here in Toronto should be supporting me, not calling me crazy or saying I need psychological help for desiring to be with Jenna. Her being a star is not reason why we cannot be together, that’s just a bullshit excuse they fall back on simply because they are jealous, envious and whatever else for not going for whoever they truly loved in their lives. I am not going to be old in my bed and depressed over giving up on being with Jenna. I would rather smoke and drink myself to death creating all this then face a healthy senior life with anyone else. If I cannot be with Jenna? I want to be here on this computer, if I cannot do either? Shoot me right now, you have my permission. ⁂
Jeremiah 23:31 Yes,” declares the LORD, “I am against the prophets who wag their own tongues and yet declare, ‘The LORD declares.’ https://www.google.com/search?q=clara+oswald+tomorrow+i+might+say+yes&rlz=1C5GCEA_enCA851CA852&sxsrf=ACYBGNSzQN7MDOmQH9piysWGedDTSPCZpA:1581860734757&tbm=isch&source=iu&ictx=1&fir=cLOGL19xeyLTzM%253A%252CDCyZA8lA9TOoXM%252C_&vet=1&usg=AI4_-kTMaFjaFg-l8f9pgd0vkROoDJV6YQ&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjFjLe5mtbnAhXQnuAKHVNPAmMQ9QEwA3oECAQQBQ#imgrc=cLOGL19xeyLTzM:
Philippians 4:13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength. https://www.vice.com/en_ca/article/7bmwgq/jesus-christ-king-of-poland-876
The urge to be with Jenna physically is stronger than the urge for cocaine, speed and heroine despite those three being everpresent since doing them in the past many times. Hence why despite my cocaine dealer vanishing into thin air suddenly? It does not bother me as much as not being able to speak with Jenna physically one on one. I don’t even expect to her live with her 24/7, even periodic visits is good enough for me. At which point it’s just like getting to do Cocaine for 10 days every 3-4 months or whatever. It really boils down to I can only show I how truly feel physically, and I am not talking about sex. Just simple physical intimacy. https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/myths-desire/201708/the-sexual-science-cuddling
In the meantime drugs and alcohol do help allot, they numb the love trying to explode inside me. https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm+23-24&version=ESV
Quran 23:18 And We have sent down rain from the sky in a measured amount and settled it in the earth. And indeed, We are Able to take it away.
Joshua 23:15 New International Version (NIV) 15 But just as all the good things the Lord your God has promised you have come to you, so he will bring on you all the evil things he has threatened, until the Lord your God has destroyed you from this good land he has given you. https://twitter.com/kobos_g https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clair_de_Lune https://www.quora.com/What-does-1-gram-of-cocaine-look-like
Isaiah 11:1 A shoot will spring up from the stump of Jesse, and a branch from his roots will bear fruit. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Matchmaker_(1997_film) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Sky_Is_Falling_(Pearson_novel)